Letting Go

          Character is forged in the smallest of struggles.
             Then, when the big challenges come, we're ready.
                                         -- Waiter Rant

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LETTING GO
Heidi Lynn Poakeart

      I have always found it amazing how other people's words can have
such impact on our lives...
      We tend to want to be optimistic, in such a world full of
negativity, but sometimes it is difficult to have the "glass half
full" feeling, especially when you just feel like putting your head
to the ground and wallowing in self pity.
      However, every now and again, there is someone, perhaps that
guardian angel, who appears at just the right time, to help you see
things in another perspective.
      I had gotten up on the wrong side of the bed, having feelings of
sadness and depression.  Perhaps this time it was the weather, the
Monday blues, or problems of the past that I tend to let resurface
occasionally when I get in my "therapy didn't help me" mood.
Whatever it was, I was feeling down.
      I went to work, where I answer phones for a paper supply
company.  Things can be quite fast paced and challenging on a daily
basis.  It was 8am, and before I could sit down at my desk, the phone
rang.  Regardless of how I was feeling, I answered with a cheery tone.
      On the other end, a raging customer screamed, cursed and ranted
at me.  I let her get it out, for what felt like five minutes,
although what I really wanted to do was hang up.  There was no reason
I deserved that kind of treatment, that was for sure.  I told her she
should speak to a manager, as I knew there was nothing I could say to
calm her or make her feel better.  Eventually, the manager resolved
it and the whole episode was over.
      Yet, it was still in my head, and I heard those harsh words over
and over.  I became even more depressed, a victim of this crazy
lady's rampage.  I was upset, and it showed.
      At that moment, another employee who witnessed all of this came
over to me.  He put his arm around me and said, "You will live a good
life if you don't weaken," and then he walked away.
      It did not sink in at first, but after really thinking about it,
I felt a release in such a way that truly brought strength to my
entire body, and the negative and depressed feelings began to fade.
It was truly amazing, the impact those ten small words had on me.
     How true they were and how they can be applied to so many
different aspects of life.  I did not want to be weak, especially
about something I had no control over nor deserved.  I did not want
to be weak about anything in my life, past, present, or future.
     I am a cancer survivor and I certainly know what it is like to
have strength, so why weaken now, just because of one bad morning?  I
put it all into perspective, as it was reconfirmed to me that it is
best to let things go before they threaten to weaken you and your
spirit.
     I told myself that life is good, and no matter what, I will stand
proud and strong the way I know how.
      I ended up having a good day after my angel, whom I needed so
desperately at that moment, spoke those ten small words to me.  Those
words will help guide me through the rest of my life.
      I am sure there will be more bad and depressing days, as well as
moments of weakness.  That is inevitable.  But after what I learned,
I do believe I won't ever weaken so easily again, because life is
good.
      I have life and I am strong, and from now on, I will forever see
the glass as half full.

             -- Heidi Lynn Poakeart     <heid70 @ aol.com>

“It ain't what you don't know that gets you into trouble. It's what you know for sure that just ain't so.”

Mark Twain quotes