Friday, April 6, 2007

Mom's Email (Thanks Renee)

Dear Friends,
I have to thank Renee for this email!   I cannot resist sharing it. If you like it, share it with some Mom you know and care about!
I love these kind of things that make me cry so much though!
Sometimes when I am riding around in my car, I think of something that happened to my son Tim growing up, and I start crying right then. Sometimes I do that thinking of my husband Dave's tender moments (forgetting the times he's occasionally been a jerk).  If I am bawling, I am not unhappy.  Crazy as that sounds. Tears of joy are the very best kind. And like my Daddy, I have ALWAYS cried easily.
Now, often I think about "Jack"  & I really cry easy when I do that.  I can't wait to see him!  But I am leery too, because he will change our lives (although for the better for everyone)!  But Tim won't be just a husband & our son.  He will be a Dad and I am so happy for him about that, that I cry.   Patti will be a Mother. She is a smart confident career woman, but she seems to have a lot of baby knowledge although I am not sure where she got it from.  When I was pregnant and when Tim was born, I knew nothing.  Patti seems guided by a some kind of common sense I did not have.  Maybe it's because I was 18 and she is 32.  I don't know, but there is a difference. 
Subject: Perspective of a mother<?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" />


 We are sitting at lunch one day when my daughter casually mentions that she and her husband are thinking of "starting a family."

"We're taking a survey," she says half-joking. "Do you think I should have a baby?"

"It will change your life," I say, carefully keeping my tone neutral.

"I know," she says, "no more sleeping in on weekends, no more spontaneous vacations."

But that is not what I meant at all.

I look at my daughter, trying to decide what to tell her. I want her to know what she will never learn in childbirth classes. I want to tell her that the physical wounds of child bearing will heal, but becoming a mother will leave her with an emotional wound so raw that she will forever be vulnerable. I consider warning her that she will never again read a newspaper without asking, "What if that had been MY child?" That every plane crash, every house fire will haunt her. That when she sees pictures of starving children, she will wonder if anything could be worse than watching your child die. I look at her carefully manicured nails and stylish suit and think that no matter how sophisticated she is, becoming a mother will reduce her to the primitive level of a bear protecting her cub. That an urgent call of "Mom!" will cause her to drop a soufflĂ© or her best crystal without a moments hesitation.

I feel that I should warn her that no matter how many years she has invested in her career, she will be professionally derailed by motherhood. She might arrange for childcare, but one day she will be going into an important business meeting and she will think of her baby's sweet smell. She will have to use every ounce of discipline to keep from running home, just to make sure her baby is all right.

I want my daughter to know that every day decisions will no longer be routine. That a five year old boy's desire to go to the men's room rather than the women's at McDonald's will become a major dilemma. That right there, in the midst of clattering trays and screaming children, issues of independence and gender identity will be weighed against the prospect that a child molester may be lurking in that restroom.

However decisive she may be at the office, she will second-guess herself constantly as a mother.

Looking at my attractive daughter, I want to assure her that eventually she will shed the pounds of pregnancy, but she will never feel the same about herself. That her life, now so important, will be of less value to her once she has a child. That she would give herself up in a moment to save her offspring, but will also begin to hope for more years, not to accomplish her own dreams, but to watch her child accomplish theirs. I want her to know that a cesarean scar or shiny stretch marks will become badges of honor. My daughter's relationship with her husband will change, but not in the way she thinks. I wish she could understand how much more you can love a man who is careful to powder the baby or who never hesitates to play with his child. I think she should know that she will fall in love with him again for reasons she would now find very unromantic.

 I wish my daughter could sense the bond she will feel with women throughout history who have tried to stop war, prejudice and drunk driving. I want to describe to my daughter the exhilaration of seeing your child learn to ride a bike. I want to capture for her the belly laugh of a baby who is touching the soft fur of a dog or cat for the first time. I want her to taste the joy that is so real it actually hurts. My daughter's quizzical look makes me realize that tears have formed in my eyes. "You'll never regret it," I finally say. Then I reached across the table, squeezed my daughter's hand and offered a silent prayer for her, and for me, and for all the mere mortal women who stumble their way into this most wonderful of callings.

 Please share this with a Mom that you know or all of your girlfriends who may someday be Moms.

 May you always have in your arms the one who is in your heart.


Tuesday, April 3, 2007

Birth testing

Dear Friends, Pals, Buddies, Confidants, Do this one!  It's really pretty accuarate. I have done it on my family members and I know it's probably coincidental but it hits the nail on the head.  Check it out!
(Thanks Rhonda!)
   Once you have discovered your birth number, forward this E-mail to the rest of your friends, including the one who sent this to you.
Put your "number" in the "Subject" and pass it on. Have fun.
Your birth date describes who we are, what we are good at and what our inborn abilities are.  It also points to what we have to learn and the challenges we are facing.
To figure out your birth number, add all the numbers in the birth date together, like the example below, until there is only one digit.
A birth number does not prevent you from being anything you want to be, it will just color your choice differently and give you a little insight.
Example: March 20, 1950

3 + 20 + 1950 = 1973
1 + 9 + 7 + 3 = 20
 2 + 0 = 2

Keep going until you end up with a single digit number. For this example, 2 is the birth number to read for the birth date below. Find your number and then read on.

     #1 The Originator

     #2 The Peacemaker

     #3 The Life Of The Party

     #4 The Conservative

     #5 The Nonconformist

     #6 The Romantic

     #7 The Intellectual

     #8 The Big Shot

 #9 The Performer
I am a 9.  It's pretty close to me!  I am not a "talented" person as an adult, but I was in ways as a child.  I am a caring and generous person.  I generally do make friends easily and I have a generous nature (beyond my means, actually).  Because I am hyper (the chronic anxiety) I do have a hard time as far as changing my mind.  I am very firm in my convictions, but if I change my mind, I completely change it.  My husband has never known what to expect from me. I am not predictable!  At least, I am not boring.

Let me know how YOU score on this; I really want to hear!  I am so curious!

     # 1 - The Originator ... 1's are originals. Coming up with new ideas and executing them is natural. Having things their! own way is another trait that gets them as being stubborn and arrogant. 1's are extremely honest and do well to learn some diplomacy skills. They like to take the initiative and are often leaders or bosses, as they like to be the best.  Being self-employed is definitely helpful for them. Lesson to learn: Others' ideas might be just as good or better and to stay open minded.

     Famous 1's are Don Kotula, Tom Hanks, Robert Redford,
Hulk Hogan,  Carol Burnett, Wynonna Judd, Nancy Reagan, and
Raquel Welch.

     #2 - The Peacemaker ... 2's are the born diplomats. They are aware of others' needs and moods and often think of others before themselves.  Naturally analytical and very intuitive they don't like to be alone.  Friendship and companionship are very important and can lead them to be successful in life, but on the other hand, they'd rather be alone than in an uncomfortable relationship. Being naturally shy, they should learn to boost their self-esteem and express themselves freely
and seize the
moment and not put things off.

  Famous 2's are President Bill Clinton, Madonna, Whoopee
Goldberg, Thomas Edison,Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart.

     #3 - The Life Of The Party ... 3's are idealists. They are very reative, social, charming, romantic, and easygoing. They start manythings but don't always see them through. They like others to be happy
   and go to great lengths to achieve it. They are very popular and idealistic. They should learn to see the world from a more realistic point of view.
 3's are Alan Alda,Ann Landers, Bill Cosby, Melanie Griffith,
   Salvador Dali, and Jodi Foster.

     #4 - The Conservative ... 4's are sensible and traditional. They like order and routine. They only act when they fully understand what they are expected to do. They like getting their hands dirty and working hard. They are attracted to the outdoors and feel an affinity with nature. They are prepared to wait and can be stubborn and persistent. They should learn to be more flexible and to be nice to themselves.
    Famous 4's are Neil Diamond, Margaret Thatcher, Arnold
Schwarzenegger, Tina Turner, Paul Hogan, and Oprah Winfrey.
#5 - The Nonconformist ... 5's are the explorers. Their natural
curiosity, risk taking, and enthusiasm often land them in hot water. They need diversity, and don't like to be stuck in a rut. The whole world is their school and they see a learning possibility in every situation. The questions never stop. They are well advised to look before they take action and make sure they have all the facts before jumping to conclusions.
 Famous 5's are Abraham Lincoln, Charlotte Bronte, Jessica Walter, Vincent Van Gough, Bette Midler, Helen Keller, and! Mark Hail.

     #6 - The Romantic ... 6's are idealistic and need to feel useful to be happy. A strong family connection is important to them. Their actions influence their decisions. They have a strong urge to take care of others and to help. They are very loyal and make great teachers. They like art or music. They make loyal friends who take friendship seriously. 6's should learn to differentiate between what they can change and what they can't.

     Famous 6's are Albert Einstein, Jane Seymour, John Denver,
Meryl Streep, Christopher Columbus, and Goldie Hawn.
   #7 - The Intellectual ... 7's are the searchers. Always probing for hidden information, they find it difficult to accept things at face value. Emotions don't sway their decisions. Questioning everything in life, they don't like to be questioned themselves. They're never off to a fast start, and their motto is, "Slow and Steady Wins the Race. They come across as philosophical and being very knowledgeable, and sometimes as loners. They are technically inclined and make great researchers uncovering information. They love to uncover secrets. They live in their own quiet world and could do a better job of learning what is acceptable in the world at large.

     Famous 7's are William Shakespeare, Lucille Ball, Michael
Jackson, Joan Baez, and Princess Diana.

     #8 - The Big Shot ... 8's are the Problem Solvers. They are
professional, blunt and to the point, have good judgment and are decisive. They have grand plans and like to live the good life. They take charge of people. They view people objectively. They let you know in no uncertain terms that they are the boss. They should learn to exude their decisions on their own needs rather than what others want.
     Famous 8's are Edgar Cayce, Barbara Streisand, George
Harrison, Jane Fonda, Pablo Picasso, Aretha Franklyn, and
    #9 - The Performer . 9's are natural entertainers. They are very caring and generous, giving away their last dollar to help. With their charm they have no problem making friends and nobody is a stranger to them. They have so many different personalities that people around them have a hard time understanding them. They are like chameleons, ever changing and blending in. They have tremendous luck, but also can suffer from extreme in fortune and mood. To be successful, they need to build a loving foundation.
       Famous 9's are Albert Schweitzer, Shirley MacLaine,
Harrison Ford, Jimmy Carter, and Elvis Presley